i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
