Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
