Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
third nipple confirmed
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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