i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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