If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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