That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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