it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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