doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
