yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize