Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
if only i could text you this smell
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
