nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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