apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
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