at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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