its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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