Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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