i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
