Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
