i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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