It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Randomize