u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
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When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
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not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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