Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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