In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
