I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize