I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
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You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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