Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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