i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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