never play flip cup with pint glasses
Life is so much better after having sex.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Mom said you looked used
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize