i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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