Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize
