i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
How did I end up in the pool?!
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He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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