Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
This house was built for laser tag.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
pray to the hookup gods
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
