my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Randomize
