dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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