youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
