discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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