It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
She told me I should be a condom model.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
The struggles of a small town man whore
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I'm bleeding and have questions
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
