Pants 0. Shit 1.
thus making me awesome and them whores
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
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