So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
