So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
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