Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
