Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
a search helicopter?!
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
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