Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
