Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Randomize
