Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Fuck appropriateness.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
