ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
