I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
