All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize