Where did you get a picture of my penis
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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