She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
