I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize