awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
